Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Rice rice baby

As a PhD student I sometimes have evening seminars that I have to attend.  As a "good" wife I make sure I leave my husband a meal in the fridge so that he can cook it when he gets home and doesn't go hungry.  These meals keep in mind have the meat, seasoning, sides, cooking instructions, all put together in a single zip lock bag.  All my husband has to do is open, read, prepare, and eat.  The meal for the evening was BBQ chicken with a side of sweet potato fries.
My darling husband gets home, looks at the bag and determines this meal would not be balanced without rice (as a true Indian I should've known he would want rice).  Instead of texting me (he didn't want to interrupt my super "important" PhD seminar) or use that new fangled thing called google, he elected to call the Patel family house.  His father answered the phone the conversation went something like this. . .
Sankat- Hi Dad, what is the ratio of water to rice
Dad- well first you take out the pressure cooker
Sankat- we don't have one, but the question is what is the ratio
Dad- we have an extra one at the house
Sankat- no dad we don't want one, what is the ratio
Dad- ok, take out the rice maker
Sankat- we don't have one, ratio dad
Dad- we have an extra one at the house we can bring to you
Sankat- we don't want one dad I just want to cook the rice on the stove, ratio please
Dad- where's Selina
Sankat- school dad
Dad- well your mom always cooks the rice, call her

Not part of this story but there is a small skirmish about Sankat's mom driving while talking on the phone

Sankat- hi mom, how are you.. .
Mom- Great Beta
Sankat- Mom I'm making rice what is the ratio of water to rice?
Mom- well first you take out the pressure cooker
Sankat- no mom we don't have one, what is the ratio
Mom- we have an extra one at the house
Sankat- no mom we don't want one, what is the ratio
Mom- ok, take out the rice maker
Sankat- we don't have one, ratio mom
Mom- we have an extra one at the house we can bring to you
NOTICE the Pattern here
Sankat- WE DON'T WANT ONE, I just want to make rice on the stove
Mom- Where's Selina?
Sankat- school
Mom- You know you can make premade rice
Sankat- MOM
Mom- well first you must soak the rice for 20 min
Sankat- I Don't have time
Mom- 2 to 1

Now I can just picture my loving mother in law getting off the phone and looking at her husband shaking her head and saying, "You know, he has a LOVE marriage and look what happens, NObody know how to make rice."

How will I ever make this up to my mother in-law to prove that even white women can cook rice and get their PhD at the same time.